One of the hardest things of being single parent is making all of the decisions on your own. How are we supposed to know if we’re making proper choices when there isn’t a 2nd opinion giving guidance, support, or knowledge? It’s a lot of stress for one person to carry off what it sometimes takes a village to maintain.
In my experience of single motherhood (with no co-parenting and no child support), I worked 2-4 jobs. During my start-up days, I cooked at a local restaurant 3 days a week, had private chef clients 2 days a week, taught group fitness 3 nights a week, and picked up catering gigs anywhere in between.
I financially supported us, but I felt like the money was never enough. I was on a shoestring budget for necessities like groceries, gas, school/ activity supplies, etc.
So when my son was “old enough” to stay at home alone, I had to make the hard decision of working as a bartender. I worked only one night a week. The restaurant was a short 1.5 miles away from our small apartment, but I couldn’t help but be pained with guilt every time I had to leave him for work.
Friday evenings operated like this, my son came home from school at 3 pm. I gave him his favorite snack of cheese and apples, and then we would play. I fed him dinner, kissed him goodbye, and then left for my bar tending shift. I would get home by midnight with $200 in my pocket. Even though the extra money helper us tremendously, it never felt worth it.
During one of my bar tending shifts Zared texted me to tell me he was hungry:
“Mom, I’m still hungry. What should I eat?” Says Zared
“Babe, did you eat all of your dinner?”
“Yes, mom I did. But I’m STILL hungry!”
“Babe, make a snack! Get creative! There’s string cheese, apples, carrots, find something!”
“I’m tired of eating the same stuff.” Zared complained
“Well that’s all we have. So you’re just going to have to deal with that until I can go to the store and get more food.”
I hated this situation. I felt like a neglectful mother. If I were with him at home, he wouldn’t be hungry. But if I wasn’t here at work, we‘d be broke.
About an hour later he texted me a photo. The caption wrote:
“Look Mom! I made pancakes! They turned out pretty good!”
“You made those? Wow they look great!! How did you figure out how to make them?” I asked.
“Youtube! It was easy. We had all of the ingredients here. I’ll make them for you sometime. Love you.”
I didn’t know whether to applaud him for learning how to make pancakes on his own, or whether to cry because he HAD to learn how to make pancakes on his own. It was bittersweet, this feeling I had. I was so proud of him, yet so sad for him at the same time.
One of the hardest things of being single parent is making all of the decisions on your own.
How are we supposed to know if we’re making proper choices, when there isn’t a 2nd opinion giving guidance, support, or knowledge?
That’s just it, we won’t ever know if we’re doing it right. We just have to continue to do what feels right. And until we figure that out, there’s always pancakes…..
Here’s a delicious, clean-eating pancake recipe that’s paleo, easy, and quick to make….
Nut Butter Chia Protein Pancakes
Ingredients
5 eggs
3 ripe bananas – divided
2 scoops whey/plant-based protein
2 tablespoons of nut butter
2 tablespoons chia seeds
11/2 teaspoon vanilla extract
A drop of Young Living Cinnamon Essential Oil (1 teaspoon cinnamon)
A drop of Young Living Nutmeg Essential Oil (1/2 teaspoon nutmeg)
Pinch of salt
1 teaspoon coconut or olive spray
Time: 25 min Yields: 4
Method
Combine all of the ingredients (except for coconut oil) + 2 bananas in a blender and blend.
Set your pancake griddle (or small sauté pan) on medium heat. Add coconut oil.
Scoop ¼ cup sized pancakes and line them on the griddle, enough to have 8 pancakes evenly distributed on the griddle. They cook fairly quickly so keep an eye on them. Flip once the pancakes have taken a solid shape. Cook for another 30 seconds.
Garnish with sliced bananas, almonds, chia seeds, and real maple syrup!
Variations
Paleo Option: Leave out protein
Vegan Option: Substitute eggs for ¼ cup of applesauce – make sure to use plant-based protein only